So if you don't know, I am now eligible for a pretty big raise ($4). That's big for me. We have a "clinical ladder" in place at work where nurses have to meet certain expectations to move up a level. To go from a 3 to a 4, I have to have 5 years experience, my Bachelors, and my national certification amongst other little piddley stuff around the unit. For those of you who weren't around 3 years ago .... I busted my backside to get my bachelors degree. I was pregnant, and when Braden's "sperm donor" left me at 7 months pregnant, I tried to quit. I actually had the "I Quit!" paper on the fax machine when my mom stopped me by saying, "You can't let him take this from you too." Hell no I won't. And I didn't. I made it! I moved twice, and I had a newborn, but I made it. I also studied for months and got my national certification for OR nurses. I have taken over as chairman of our recruitment and retention council, and I do ALOT of work for our councils/committees within our unit and hospital wide. I told you all of that so you could appreciate a little bit how much this meant to me! It has been the carrot dangled in front of my face for 4 years now! So when I was told today that they are not allowing anyone to move up to a 4, I fell apart in my manager's office. She tried to comfort me by saying that I made myself a better nurse and that she knew how hard it was to be a single mom. IT'S NOT ABOUT THAT! I worked so hard for this ..... not to be a better nurse (well a little) but to be a better provider for my son. I did it for us. I did it to better my life, my career, my family. UGH! So anyway, I literally in my head said, "Please, God .... do something to change this right now! Make it go away. Rewind to yesterday and change something in their minds and we can just relive today - I won't even tell anyone about my deja vu!" It sounded ridiculous, and I knew that tears would be falling soon AGAIN, and I would get a crying hangover AGAIN. I was getting tired of these! I walk out of her office, and her secretary stops me in the hall and says, "give me your application back, Jessie wants it." (Jessie is our director of nursing who approves the ladder advances) WHAT?! Is this a joke. It wasn't a joke. She called and said she wanted it back a day later. I'm not getting my hopes up, but holy cow! I'm a Christian, and I have a growing faith in the Lord, but I'm the first person in the congregation to roll my eyes when our pastor tells an outrageous story about how he prayed for something and got it in an unusual way. So when I prayed and got an immediate answer, I was blown away! So everyone please please please pray for me and Braden this weekend. Hopefully I will find out next week, but I am trusting the Lord here. I know it was a sign from Him when the phone rang while I was in the office stopping me seconds before my inevitable break down! We need this, I've earned this, and He knows this would be such a blessing! I know God wants more for me than I want for myself .... I'm going forward in faith. Stay tuned ...
5 comments:
I'm praying for you!! You have so much to be proud of. You've overcome so much. Your biggest brag is that little angel you're doing such a good job raising.
That is an awesome story and we will be praying for you this weekend!!!! I am so proud of everything that you have accomplished!!!
God works in strange ways, sometimes we get our prayers answered and sometimes we have to wait for his answer, either way God knows what is best for you right now even though it may not seem like it. You are in my prayers that you get the outcome you want.
OMG! What a moving story! you're right, you do deserve this, you have worked so hard. i will be praying for you. good luck!
I will be praying for you, I hope you get it! You have worked so hard! Good Luck!
PS: You are an inspiration for all the hard work you have done!
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